Youtube Arsehole
Several years ago I flipped open my new phone and stared into the eye of its camera, little knowing I was gazing into a darkness that would send me on a death march of youtube comments. Curses!
I cottoned on to the fact I could make ridiculous ranting videos with this device and began to do so with some success and all the interwebs negativity that comes with it. I'm already an angry bastard, but I really got amongst it for it for a while there. What was supposed to be cathartic became a horrible unpaid job and lost in a forest of bitterness and bitchiness I wandered O very much like a Shit Addict. Of course I also picked up all sorts of skills along the way, made some cool music videos and a few comedy shorts that are quite brilliant but this isn't about me being awesome- let's face it, I really am- this is about my walk on the internet micro-celebrity shame trail.
The thing is, I'm a fighter. I like fighting people. On the internet you can fight and fight and there's nobody to stop you. So after a while I became angry that nobody was stopping me. And I wanted to fight them.
I had never interacted with anybody online before and now I was talking to thousands of people and stupidly trying to react to all of it, both positive and negative. And we know what happens to tired bears don't we? They get cranky. I look back at those years and it's like I was a junkie or something. A junkie who was addicted to the internet and internet-related activities! Like with drugs!
Online I had all these people telling me I was amazing but in real life I was a guy who didn't get out enough. There were reasons for that, like wanting to not have a panic attack when out with friends, but sooner or later you realize your social skills are dying because you're not outside using them. For me it was waaay much later.
One day I realised that my seemingly insurmountable skull problems were probably 90% about being trapped in a house. So I started to go out and work on my laptop in cafes, where I remembered I wasn't an internet person, I was a person person. Big relief. At this same moment I fell out with two friends who were right the fuck into being negative about my endeavours and more importantly me, so I took the opportunity to jettison the bastards from my life, which improved immediately and massively.
When I started doing open mics I was still shaky in social situations but time spent among people who are on edge because they're possibly about to fail at something really hard in front of a room full of people has been tremendously heart chakra.
The other night a comic asked me for clues about how to get lots of people looking at his a funny video. My answer? Spam.
Which reminds me: it's great to not feel like a piece of processed meat. Nice finish, me!
I cottoned on to the fact I could make ridiculous ranting videos with this device and began to do so with some success and all the interwebs negativity that comes with it. I'm already an angry bastard, but I really got amongst it for it for a while there. What was supposed to be cathartic became a horrible unpaid job and lost in a forest of bitterness and bitchiness I wandered O very much like a Shit Addict. Of course I also picked up all sorts of skills along the way, made some cool music videos and a few comedy shorts that are quite brilliant but this isn't about me being awesome- let's face it, I really am- this is about my walk on the internet micro-celebrity shame trail.
The thing is, I'm a fighter. I like fighting people. On the internet you can fight and fight and there's nobody to stop you. So after a while I became angry that nobody was stopping me. And I wanted to fight them.
I had never interacted with anybody online before and now I was talking to thousands of people and stupidly trying to react to all of it, both positive and negative. And we know what happens to tired bears don't we? They get cranky. I look back at those years and it's like I was a junkie or something. A junkie who was addicted to the internet and internet-related activities! Like with drugs!
Online I had all these people telling me I was amazing but in real life I was a guy who didn't get out enough. There were reasons for that, like wanting to not have a panic attack when out with friends, but sooner or later you realize your social skills are dying because you're not outside using them. For me it was waaay much later.
One day I realised that my seemingly insurmountable skull problems were probably 90% about being trapped in a house. So I started to go out and work on my laptop in cafes, where I remembered I wasn't an internet person, I was a person person. Big relief. At this same moment I fell out with two friends who were right the fuck into being negative about my endeavours and more importantly me, so I took the opportunity to jettison the bastards from my life, which improved immediately and massively.
When I started doing open mics I was still shaky in social situations but time spent among people who are on edge because they're possibly about to fail at something really hard in front of a room full of people has been tremendously heart chakra.
The other night a comic asked me for clues about how to get lots of people looking at his a funny video. My answer? Spam.
Which reminds me: it's great to not feel like a piece of processed meat. Nice finish, me!
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