Use Your Fucking Words

"I was just thinking back to how weird it was when Rush was President of the United States of America. So odd that a prog band beloved by guitar nerds was ever president, but then again his father George H W Rush had a go so maybe it's fair enough."

Sean looked at the terrible idea and wondered where it came from. Hack Comedy Hell? Some horror realm where weak wordplay and references to total bullshit dance a nightmare waltz? His own arsehole?

Anyway.

The keyboard stared back at him, giving nothing away.

He really needed to go to the gym. He could feel his midriff almost liquefying as he sat at the table in his comfortable active wear. He wondered if it was "activewear" or "active wear". He thought about words he hated. Grub, Gronk and Flog, three new Australian insults that were new, or new to him anyway. What was wrong with just fucking swearing? Were Australians worried that proper swearing was not classy enough for this backward head injury land? 

"We need to do better". That was an American one that could take a flying fuck at a woodchipper. "You don't get to-" was an almost definite least favourite. "You don't get to (insert activity I am trying to to stop you from doing by addressing you with the most precious word formulation imaginable)". It always sounded like it should go, "You don't get to (blah blah blah) Mister Man."

People didn't want to use real swear words and were into prissy phrasing because they wanted to be seen to be on the right side of history, but didn't want to run the risk of doing anything real about it.

It was time for his morning shit.




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