Australia. What am it?

1. Australia Day marks the anniversary of the 1788 arrival of the First Fleet of British Ships at Port Jackson, New South Wales, where people with maggots in their bumcracks promptly staged a beach orgy while the officer class looked on and half heartedly masturbated while trying to conjure mental images of their own mothers.
2. In present-day Australia, celebrations reflect the diverse society and landscape of a nation to this day dominated by the dumbest cunts in all of Creation. To be an "Australian" is to look around you every day and wonder how the fuck these emotional cripples get through the day without being reminded which hole to shit out of.
3. The meaning and significance of Australia Day has evolved over time. Haha! No it hasn't! This benighted desert of weakly rooted nationalist vegetables has always been an embarrassment to not only itself but it's imaginary friends.
4. Foreigners don't even bother to hate us, we're that fucking needy of approval.
5. Look at us America, we're sucking your balls!

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